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It never fails. Every single time we go to Target, my happy toddler turns into a monster. I really don’t beat my children, but you’d never believe me if you saw us in Target. I must be the worst mom in the world to think that any child would enjoy strolling around with a slushie and popcorn. It used to embarrass me, but now it’s just a way of life.

I see people post on Facebook about how they would never let their child act “that way”. I must have missed that portion of the parent handbook where I can flip her psycho switch off, because I am no longer the boss when we walk through the doors of Target. I use Clicklist religiously, I take snacks everywhere we go, and I wait until my kids are asleep to leave for any trip. But can you just give me 30 minutes to stroll through Target aimlessly without sounding like a dying cat?!

No, I don’t really NEED anything at Target, but I gave birth to you. I’ve sacrificed a lot for your happiness, but Target will not be one of them. Nope.

I’ve had many bright ideas of how to make Target a “fun trip” but if you’re mad that I’m buying you a swimming pool, I don’t know how to help you, my friend.

Our last trip to Target resulting in you throwing one of your shoes out of the basket and mommy failing to find it. You laughed while I panicked,  but jokes on you. They sell shoes at Target.